I am drop dead in the middle of this whole experience and I feel like I am at the toughest part. I want to just push through and distract myself until I am happier but I know that if I do that I am going to miss a whole lot of my time here. 103 days left baby…Imma live it up and listen to the wise, calming words of my mother. “this too will pass”…I love that quote because the whole “everything will be alright” saying drives me up the wall….everything IS NOT always alright and that is ok and normal…yes, positive thinking is awesome and I support that 100% but I also support sadness and tears and everything will pass, but to hell with the everything is gonna be perfect stuff…I am sorry but our wounds do leave scars, the rawness of a tragedy or difficult time DOES pass, but we do remain baring scars and that is ok and we have to realize that it is just a sign of strength. I am now working twice a week in the mornings when I don’t have school. Both my parents now have jobs in San Jose and they get up at 4:30 or 5 everyday and somehow have the energy to come home and talk and laugh and hug and smile. On Mondays I volunteer at the local Pharmacy-in this place I can literally do everything…I talk to people and ask what they need or what their symptoms are and then I can get them what they need or suggest medicine. I get to organize all the stocks of medicines and by doing this I A. learn what all the products do and B. Learn medical terms in Spanish. On Fridays I volunteer with Alina at the old peoples home here in Puriscal….they are all so sweet and lovely and have awesome stories and histories. I love it all.